


You shall have both

by Marayena



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-21 19:40:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20698811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marayena/pseuds/Marayena
Summary: A giant bowl of popcorn suddenly meets them in the hallway, followed by Poe, Finn -Poe's boyfriend and… her.Rey.The reprieve in his misery and the pinnacle around which his world revolves. If true north was a person for him it would be her. The only source of joy in his miserable existence.---Ben is angsty, tormented and sad. Rey is a beam of sunlight in his darkness. And very horny.An unapologetic, slightly angsty first time smut-fest.Enjoy.





	You shall have both

God, he is such a piece of shit.

The girl moans, arching her back, the light reflecting off her lush skin. The sight _should_ be more than enough to arouse him. He thrusts harder and she seems to like it if her eyes, closed in bliss, and her teeth worrying her lips are anything to go by.

Ben closes his eyes, hiding his face in her hair so that she can’t see him. He can smell a flowery shampoo, maybe some perfume. A little bit of her own smell, but he isn’t sure. It isn’t very interesting to him, so he hasn’t bothered to remember it.

Her low panting and breathy sighs make it easy to imagine it’s another girl under him. One who also has hazel eyes, brown hair and a wide, sunny smile. 

Ben allows himself to indulge in the fantasy for a little. He imagines that _ she _would look at him. That her smile would light up the room they’re in, the way it always does. Only now it would be just for him. Her arms would hold him. She would whisper sweet nothings and love him here, in this private universe. She would-

“Oooh.” A moan makes the picture he tries to paint shatter as if it were fragile glass. He is reminded once again that this is the wrong girl. The wrong voice moaning, the wrong smile and the wrong face looking up at him. He opens his eyes, glances to his left. 

There is a hoodie lying on the floor. _ She _has worn it recently. It still smells a bit like her. The scent of salt and paints and flowers. A hint of something, lime maybe, some days. Maybe a different lotion than the one she regularly uses. He wonders idly if he could reach it from where he lies. If the girl on the bed would notice if he buried his face in the fabric as he came. 

A wave of fresh self-loathing washes over him at the thought and he ponders again at the futility of trying to get over someone by using someone else. Doesn’t that just perpetuate the cycle of hurt and pain and unrequited longing? That the girl he’s so callously fucking will go on with her life and in her turn try to get over him. Fucking another guy. Making that guy pine and yearn. Then that guy fucking another girl. Perpetuating the cycle of misery over and over and over. Humans making other humans nothing but miserable through their selfish desperation not to feel the pain quite so sharply.

His cock getting softer inside her. Soon, she will notice, they’ll be unable to continue and he will have to handle her disappointment in him, as well as his own. Maybe she’ll even be sweet about it and he’ll feel even worse about being such an unfeeling, selfish piece of shit. Using her body for his own selfish, piece of shit reasons. He’s not sure he can do that. If he can handle hating himself anymore than he already does. Maybe he can fake it?

The thought is laughable. How low has he sunk that he is actually considering faking an orgasm? God he is such a piece of absolute, fucking, _ fucking _shit. The irony of his own word choice makes him snort. He disguises it as a groan. The purely physical stimulation should be enough to get him off. He is literally doing the thing his dick was designed for, it shouldn’t matter that he doesn’t like the girl. People have sex all the time without caring for the other person.

He can feel himself rapidly running out of time, so he does it. He speeds up his tempo, groans a few times, then staggers, pumping a few more hard, irregular thrusts against her. She moans appreciatively, running her hands through his hair, kissing his cheek, his ear. He waits for a few seconds, then pulls out, cupping himself to hide the fact that the condom is empty. He murmurs: “I’ll be right back”. Then he escapes into his bathroom. Fleeing the battlefield- like a coward.

  


He looks at himself in the mirror. His face is sweaty, and he has dark rings under his eyes. His hair is ruffled from her hands. _ I hate you so, so much, _ he thinks at the face staring back at him, before pulling off the condom and throwing it in the trash. Not being able to stand the feeling of fake clinging to him, he hops in the shower, briskly trying to wash the shame off his skin. It doesn’t work of course. Nothing ever does. He has tried everything. Booze and drugs make him forget for a while. But he hates himself even more when he sobers up.

The only brightness in his life is _ her _ . _ She _makes him want to be different. Not the way he usually tries to change, by hating himself enough to change, whipping himself with self-loathing until he becomes a better person. Anything, because really, anything would be an improvement over the person he is right now. Not that it’s ever worked. Because he’s obviously too much of a failure to do even that. No surprises there.

He sighs, drying himself off, before going out to face another person he will inevitably disappoint. 

The girl, (Britney, Bree, Bailey?) is laying on the bed, smiling lazily up at him. She doesn’t seem to mind that he didn’t get her off.  
  
  
Ben can’t deal with the additional guilt from that now too, so he ignores it. He sits down at her side, putting his hand on her shoulder, tensely faking a smile.

“Yo, Ben! Movie night in ten. You coming?” his roommate’s voice carries through the door. Poe’s not really expecting an answer, Ben knows. Just letting him know in case he had forgotten. Which he had.

Ben looks at the girl. She’s smiling apologetically up at him. “I’d stay, but I’ve promised the girls that I’ll hang out with them tonight,” she says. 

Ben is trying to keep the relief off his face. Because there is absolutely no way he was going to invite her to movie night. 

“That’s alright,” he murmurs back. 

They both get dressed and he walks her to the door. He tries to hide her from view as they pass the living room, focusing his eyes straight ahead, hoping the people sitting on the sofa doesn’t see him. No such luck. A giant bowl of popcorn suddenly meets them in the hallway, followed by Poe, Finn -Poe's boyfriend and… _ her_. 

Rey. 

The reprieve in his misery and the pinnacle around which his world revolves. If true north was a person for him it would be her. The only source of joy in his miserable existence.

“Hey, I didn’t know you had company over.” Poe’s voice is friendly. “You staying for the movie?” His eyes crinkle and his smile is wide as he greets the girl standing awkwardly in the hallway. Poe has that kind of air about him which puts everyone at ease. Even Ben. It's one of the reason Ben likes him so much, although he couldn't guess why the feeling is mutual.

“Thank you, but I’ve got plans.” The girl meets Poe'smile with one of her own. She really is very pretty. Ben hopes desperately that none of them notice the resemblance between this girl and _ the _girl. 

“Next time, then.” Poe’s smile is easy, and they crowd to the side to let her and Ben pass, before making their way into the living room.

“I’ll text you.” Ben says as she puts on her shoes and coat. She stands on her tiptoes, pressing a kiss on his lips.

“Ben.” She’s looking up at him with a sad smile. “This isn’t working, is it?”

He just numbly shakes his head and she nods. She seems very calm about it. 

“Okay. So that was that. I guess I’ll see you around, Ben.”

“See you around.” He doesn’t remember her name. He’ll have to look at what name she’s entered in his phone later. Maybe send her an apologetic text.

As he closes the door behind her he releases a pent up sigh. Wondering for the eleven thousandth time what the fuck it is he’s doing. The girl didn’t deserve this. She’s done nothing to warrant his treatment of her, other than have a passing likeness to someone else.

Ben sighs again. Then he turns and walks toward the living room.

It is impossible not to look forward to movie nights. When they cuddle up on the sofa together, the four of them. He used to like movie nights before, when it was just him and Poe. Sometimes a friend, girlfriend or boyfriend joining them. Then came Finn, and along with him came Finn’s best friend: Rey. That was one year, four months and eleven days ago. He doesn’t know why his brain still keeps count.

There had been many movie nights since that day. Probably more than a hundred. Filled with laughter, lively discussions about special effects, acting performances and whether the movie did or didn’t pass the Bechdel test. He always felt a little lighter afterwards. After spending time in her presence. Like he could breathe easier and his dark thoughts didn’t seem quite as oppressive.

Poe sits farthest to the left on the sofa, Finn leaning up against his chest, nestled in his arms. The popcorn bowl presides in the middle, the place of least contention. To the right of it sits Rey, her legs crossed and feet tucked under her, a hand halfway between the bowl and her mouth. The rightmost spot is his. Has been since the beginning. 

He plops down in it, lifting one long leg to slide behind Rey’s back before settling himself with his back against the arm rest, the other leg dangling on the floor. Rey leans contentedly back against his knee. Every time he leans forward to grab a fistful of popcorn her scent wafts from her hair. Sometimes she steals the popcorn from him before he can pull his hand back and he’ll try to steal them back. Or pin her down as he tries to grab some more before she can steal them.

She’s wearing one of his hoodies, her slight form drowning in the fabric. He knows she loves it. Loves how small and comfortable she feels while wearing them. He always leaves a hoodie in the living room nowadays. She always steals it whenever she comes over to visit, leaving the last one she "borrowed" hanging on a chair or over the back of the sofa. If he forgets to put one out she’ll steal one from his room, which he probably shouldn’t find so adorable.

Ben collects her scent. He hoards her used hoodies in a drawer so that he can bury his face in her smell when he needs it. Like a junkie with his stash. He only washes them when the scent is all but gone. Putting another used hoodie in it's place. The cycle goes on.

Poe navigates to their list on netflix. Tonight, it’s some action flick Finn has chosen. Ben doesn’t really care, his mind is occupied. Besides, the last time he’d chosen had been a disaster. Cinematic masterpieces, the Hobbit movies were not. 

\---

The movie is a drag, feeling far longer than it says on the box. Finn orders pizza when it’s finally done and they all take turns using the bathrooms and stretching their legs. Usually, they catch up on some of their favourite youtubers after the first film. Or watch video essays or reviews about the movie from more eloquent and knowledgeable people online. This action flick doesn’t really warrant any discussion. It was simply 74 minutes of ‘meh’ in ultra hd and surround sound.

Rey is reaching up her arms to him, asking for a hug. He gives her one and they stay like that for a few seconds before she says “Squeeze!” and he squeezes her until her upper back give a series of satisfying pops. Then he releases her and she sighs happily, rubbing her hands on his back up and down a few times before she lets him go. It’s an old ritual. One of the little things he lives for. Routines of affection formed from countless repetitions. A tiny ceremony transpiring the same way every time, the tracks too deeply worn to be changed by now. Just the way he likes it.

“What do you all say about the latest Bond film?” Poe is scrolling on his phone. “Nothing fun on youtube since Tuesday and it’s pretty early still.”

“I’m game.” Rey volunteers, happily. She does most things with a smile. Ben thinks he would smile too, if he’d had a smile as lovely as hers. He just nods his assent when Poe looks at him, then follows Rey into the kitchen to help make more popcorn.

Ben feels off. He just stands and stares at the jar of coconut oil absentmindedly thinking until Rey takes it from his hands.

“What’s wrong?” Her tone is soft. She knows him so well by now. He can’t lie to her.

“We broke up,” he takes a breath. “The girl and I,” he clarifies needlessly. Rey just nods and hugs him again, her small arms encircling his waist. 

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, it was mutual.” 

“Good. I didn’t really like her.” 

This pulls a laugh from him and she grins as she pulls back. He’s not sure if she meant it or if she’d just wanted to make him smile. Either way is fine. He’s just happy that she’s so firmly on his side.

They stuff themselves with pizza, talking about the bad editing of the action scenes. Ben and Rey always share one pizza, because Finn and Poe don’t like fruit in food. They prefer to share another with strange cheese or olives on it. Then they all split the third one. It's one they all like, the largest pieces going to whoever is the hungriest or who can present the most compelling argument for it. Rey usually does. She eats like a horse, despite her puny stature.

Ben wonders how long it’ll last. This easy, casual existing in each others space they're all sharing. Finn and Poe are getting serious, and he worries they’ll start looking for a place of their own soon. He might just die the day they move, because that means he will spend less time with them and that means less time with Rey. Which means that his days will not have any light at all by the end, if she stops coming around. 

He pushes it to the worry pile in the back of his head, closing the door firmly on it, as they all snuggle up on the sofa and settle down for the next movie. 

\---

It’s good. Ben enjoys it and the others seem to like it too, Poe’s fist pumping the air during some of the intense scenes. When Finn gets sleepy, like he always does at exactly 10.30 p.m, Poe puts the empty popcorn bowl on the table. When Finn’s head lands on Poe’s chest for the fifth time, the larger man simply stands up and pulls Finn with him into the bedroom. The routine not warranting a second look from Rey and Ben. They just stretch out on the sofa like they always do, her next to him, resting her head on his arm, as they finish watching the movie.

When it ends, Ben discovers that something is not the way it usually is. They usually stand, stretch and go to the kitchen. Have a cup of tea before she beds down on the sofa dressed in one of his t-shirts. Or in his bed together, as they’ve done lately. Each under their own blanket. But Rey has already fallen asleep today. She’s snoring softly, where her head rests on his arm and he wishes he didn’t have to move at all.

He extricates himself very carefully and sneaks into his room. There is nothing too damning on the floor, except maybe the pair of boxers which he quickly puts away. Then he changes his sheets, pushing the used ones far down in the hamper, and opens a window to let in some air. There is no way he’s letting Rey sleep on sheets that smell of sex.

When he’s done, he dresses in a clean t-shirt and takes off his pants. Then he carefully goes back to living room, picks Rey up and carries her to his bed. She sighs contentedly as he lays down beside her, pulling her close to his chest and wrapping his arms around her. Her small nose is burrowing into his t-shirt and he feels like he’s dying again. By infinitely small degrees.

\----------

When the morning comes he knows immediately that she’s still there, because he’s never content in the mornings any other days. He comes to slowly, allowing himself to revel in how it feels, Ray on her side facing him, tucked in his arms. He doesn’t think he moves but suddenly Rey is stirring, yawning stretching in his arms, her breasts pressing deliciously against his chest through her thin top. He takes the opportunity to pull her closer and burrow his face into her hair. Sometime during the night she’s divested herself of his hoodie and her leggings, because he can feel her bare legs tangle with his. Her scent is everywhere, filling his nose and his head in a way that sniffing a shirt never can. 

Her fingers come up to scratch at his scalp and he thinks that if he dies right now, at least he would have died happy. 

He lets out a contented groan and lets his own fingers scratch along her back in return. She giggles and writhes, pressing herself flush against him. 

Maybe not a good idea.

His erection is hard in his boxers and she way she’s moving herself against him doesn’t help. He can feel her whole body suddenly stiffen as she accidentally bumps against it. The head of his cock is nestled right at the apex of her thighs. He can feel the _ heat _ of her against it and he is sure that this, this is the moment he will remember forever because he died of embarrassment. The moment his traitorous body ruined everything by showing exactly how much he’s wanting exactly what he can't have. It's just morning wood Ben. Tell her. 

He’s trying to think of a good way to extricate himself from this situation when she moves against him again. Tentatively. Her hips tilt a little, and he feels the heat of her, as it rubs against his glans. She exhales hotly against his throat, then she’s leaning back to look at him. He just looks down at her. Not knowing what to say. His cock takes the opportunity to twitch.

Her eyes widen slightly, and she just stares at him. Calm, a little flushed. Her mouth is open a bit. 

Then she moves again. With purpose. She is rubbing herself lightly on the head of his dick and she’s wide awake and staring at him while she’s doing it. He wonders if he’s still dreaming. He doesn’t regret that he’s awake.

Careful not to break the spell, he pushes back a little, then forward again. Something is slick between them, making the movement easier. He’s not sure if it’s his precum or lubricant coming from her. Rey’s breathing is speeding up. Becoming heavy. She is rubbing herself against him. Small movements. Right on her clit probably, judging from her reaction. His breathing is growing heavy too. 

He can’t look away from her eyes. Can’t believe they’re doing this, wide awake, eyes connected, sharing the air between them.

“Ben” Her voice is a breathy whisper. “I… Can I… Can you?”

“What do you need?”

She doesn’t seem to know. She just rubs herself on him over and over and he wants desperately to just throw her on her back and fuck her like there’s no tomorrow.

She bites her lip. Blushing a little. When she tilts her face up towards him he claims her mouth.

She kisses him back. Clumsily. The feeling gives him pause. Is it possible that she might not have done this before?

He needs to take it slow. Not overwhelm her.

He lets his right hand stroke slowly along her back as he kisses her softly. Up to her shoulder blades, then down, just lightly cupping her ass. Up. Down.

He leans back again and looks at her. Checking that she’s with him. Her flush is the most attractive thing he’s ever seen and his cock twitches again. Hungry for her attention.

She looks so vulnerable. Almost afraid. He kisses her forehead. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he encourages her. Relishing in the small smile she gives him.

He captures her lips again. Because he can’t not. Then he lets his right hand travel down over her hip, steadying her rhythmic movements.

Her sounds will kill him. His cock is painfully hard but he ignores it, just letting her rub over the head of him, over and over, taking what she needs from his body. It’s the most erotic thing he’s ever experienced.

She’s starting to writhe against him. Small moans and pants finding their way out from between their lips.

He pulls back to look at her again. She’s completely flushed now. Her lips red and swollen, her eyes blown wide. 

“It’s…” she pants. “It feels so different when it’s you.” 

He smiles at her. Hungry for every shade of pleasure flickering across her face.

“...oh.” Her breathing is getting more erratic and her hips are twitching. He steadies her hips with his hands and increases his tempo, rubbing even harder against her, gliding against her slick underwear.

“...Oh. Oh!” Her hips are starting to shake for real and he kisses her mouth as she cums. Her hips are twitching violently and she’s letting out an almost pained moan.

He stills his hips slowly. Eases back gradually and lets his lips trail across her face.

She looks sated and tired and… completely mortified. 

Ben wants nothing more than to put his fingers in her panties, coating them with her oils. He wants to lick them. He wants to coat his dick in it and cum on her folds. He wants to rise up above her and sink into her wetness, let himself drown in her. But she’s looking at him like she wants nothing more than to run and hide.

So he does neither of these things.

Rey’s anxiousness is growing and he pulls up his arms to hold her. 

“Hey. Are you alright?” 

“I...” She’s blushing furiously now. “We…”

He kisses her forehead. “Rey, whatever you think of this, whatever you want this to be, it doesn’t change my opinion of you. I care about you. I respect you. That will never change.”

She seems a little calmed by this. Her eyes are finding his, looking for comfort. He cups her face with his hand, smoothing his thumb down her cheek. 

“I’ve never done this,” she whispers. “With anyone.” He nods, not wanting to say that he could tell. Wanting to worship her and thank her for letting him see her like this. For sharing it with him.

“Do you feel… used?” Her worried eyes are searching his. “I mean you didn’t…”

He just shakes his head. “I don’t feel used. Turned on like hell,” she giggles at this, “but I’m good, Rey. I am.”

She smiles up at him. “Ben.”

“Yes.”

“I just came on your dick.”

Her words make his head swim and he just swallows thickly and nods.

“Where do you want to cum?” she asks him. 

He must have misheard her. His brain must have made a computing error and told him something she did not say, because this is not real. This is a dream. A fantasy concocted by her nearness and any minute now he’ll wake up.

She just keeps looking at him, as if seriously expecting him to answer that.

“I’m… I’m pretty relaxed now that I’ve...” she whispers. “I think you’d fit. If… If you want to. With me.”

God does he want to. But he can’t take this from her. Not from her. Her wants her to enjoy her first time and he won’t be able to last more than a few seconds with the morning he’s had.

“Rey…” he begins. And he can see her face start to fall. 

“You don’t want me?” She’s blushing again. But from upset.

“What? No I do. You have no idea how much…”

“Then have sex with me. Or at least cum on me.” She’s looking defiant now. Her anger masking her insecurity.

He leans in to kiss her again. Wishing never to be the one who causes her any discomfort.

“I won’t last a minute, Rey.”

“You don’t need to. I want you to feel good. I want you to cum because of me. I want to be the one to… I want to see it. To have something of yours.”

Ben is staring at her for real now. The fact that she’s practically ordering him to fuck her and leave his cum inside her is wilder than any fantasy he’s ever had. He wants to tell her that she can have anything. Everything. All that he is and was and ever will be. But he doesn’t. 

“Are you sure?” he asks instead.

She nods. Then she’s shimmying out of her underwear and her shirt and his own clothes are soon following suit. 

The feeling of the heat from her bare skin, in combination with the knowledge that there is nothing between them; it’s maddening. He can feel himself leaking precum all over her thighs. She reaches down a hand to touch it, then touches the tip of his cock gently.

“I didn’t know men got wet too.” Her tone is teasing, as she’s pulling up her hand to look at the sticky beads on her fingers.

“For me it’s only if I’m really, really turned on.” 

Her gaze grows hot at this, pinning him in place.

“Ben Solo,” she says in a whisper. “I want you to fuck me.”

His cock twitches again, trailing more precum over her thighs and she laughs as she’s feeling it. Then she lifts her thigh onto his hip and grips his shaft, guiding him towards her entrance. 

He’s never gone anywhere as willingly in his life. 

His tip is rubbing against her folds and he wishes he had more feeling there, like in his finger tips, so that he could map her out. Instead he has to trust her, as she’s positioning him and tilting her hips. He pushes against her. Feels her heat start to envelop him and she gives a little hiss. He stops. 

“No, keep going.” 

He doesn’t.

“Maybe another angle?” He doesn’t want to tell her that they should stop. In all honesty, he doesn’t want to stop. 

She grabs his hip and urges im on but he pulls back, replacing his cock with his fingers. He parts her wet folds softly, just making sure his fingers are coated in her juices, not pushing or trying to invade. Just feeling her as he leans down to taste her mouth again.

He feels her breath hitch against his mouth as her hunger increases. When he lets his finger run up her seam and stop to circle her clit, she _ keens _. He does it again, then again, desperate for all of the little sounds she makes. When her hand grabs his cock and starts to stroke him he helplessly thrusts into her grip. She's obviously inexperienced but that does nothing to diminish his arousal. His fingers find her opening and he slips one in. She’s soaked and swollen and he pumps her easily befor slipping a second finger in, then a few moments later a third. He strokes her in tandem with her hand on his cock.

When he can’t take it anymore he gently pulls her hand from his cock then rolls them over, so that he’s on top, looking down on her and at the same time trying not to smother her small frame. She’s so tiny but he wants to press himself close. He wants to be close to her forever. 

Ben has imagined her like this so many times he’s got the fantasy memorized by now, and yet the reality is nothing like it. Her eyes are so soft and so vulnerable as she looks up at him. The flush in her skin is so much pinker than he’d envisioned. Her scent is everywhere and he’s never been so drunk on sensation. 

He kisses her nose, then her temple and then her chin. She smiles at him. It feels... personal. He knows her so well and it is fascinating to see her now. To see how her known face changes into unknown, new expressions, just for him. He kisses her again as he grabs his cock in one hand and guides it to her opening. Pushing slowly, so slowly. 

He enters her millimeter by millimeter. Pulling out a little before pushing in again to make sure he’s completely coated with her oils. She meets his gaze steadily the whole time, only closing her eyes briefly in an expression that’s as much passion as it is pain everytime he slides in a little further. It takes a lot of concentration not to cum. He's not even started. 

When at long last he bottoms out inside her they both gasp together. Then she smiles and laughs a little. Her laughter makes her walls contract around him and it’s too much. He can’t…

“Hngggh..” His whole body tenses as he cums violently. He shudders, feeling hot and cold and shivery as he buries his head in her neck, then helplessly seeks out her lips. He kisses her hard as his cock is pumping her full of more cum than he thinks he’s ever produced before, his orgasm lasting a long, long time. When he finally starts to come down, he feels mortified. Embarrassment floods his body as the cold, hard reality hits him like a wet towel thrown in his face. He just fucked this up. Royally. He just came the hardest he’s ever come and he didn’t even thrust once.

Rey takes his head between her hands and he can tell his ears are probably red because her hands feel cool against them. She pulls him back so she can look at him and she looks… happy. A little worried, but happy. She kisses his forehead and down all along his nose then over his cheek, before putting her arms around him and hugging him hard.

Ben hugs her back, taking comfort in her touches and letting himself let go of his embarrassment, ever so slightly. 

“Hey.” Her voice is a warm whisper. “I know this is pretty soon, but what happens now?”

“How do you mean by now?”

“Now, in life. Like, would you be interested in going out with me?”

He has to pull back to look at her. To see if she’s actually might doubt that he would. His expression must have been incredulous, because she gives him an impish grin that he can’t help but return. 

“Rey, I’d marry you today if that would make you happy,” he tells her completely seriously. Then wanting to kick himself for an idiot.

She laughs at this, thankfully taking it as a joke. Her wide, beautiful smile a shining beacon for his long lost heart. 

“I think I would like having you as my boyfriend first. Just to be able to say ‘my boyfriend says’ whenever I want to voice an unpopular opinion.”

“Ah, so you want to drag my name in the dirt.”

“Only a little. Just enough to scare off the competition.” she grins at him.

“Rey, there is no competition. Have you even met yourself?” Her eyes sparkle from his praise and he wonders again if he’s dreaming. If he’s actually not buried to the hilt in the most beautiful woman in the world. It does seem less probable when he puts it that way.

“Then maybe my boyfriend would like to get up and make me some breakfast?”

Ben smiles at her, feeling so light he’s almost etheric. Boyfriend doesn’t feel like enough. Worshipper or acolyte would be more apt a description. But he can’t say that.

“Your boyfriend certainly would. Say, what would my beautiful girlfriend like for breakfast today?”

“You.” She grins again. “And pancakes.” 

He kisses her softly and she kisses him back. Her small hands wandering over his shoulders and head, pulling his tousled hair back from his face. He’d give her anything. Anything she asked.

“You shall have both,” he says.

  
  
  
  



End file.
